Sadly, what is described as the happiest time of the year, can be the worst time of the year for some. Many people are depressed during this time. Many have no family, or maybe no money. Some do not believe or celebrate. Some feel the pressure to be the perfect hostess is overwhelming. Some feel that the need to decorate a beautiful home. There are all kinds of reasons that people get overwhelmed and down.
DO YOU! Do what works for you and do not apologize for it or feel bad.
The world revolves around people, and we are all different. You have your ideas and beliefs and I have mine. NO we do not have to agree. I have some very strong beliefs and ideas on certain things - you do not have to agree. Nor do you have to try to change me!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS IMPORTANT
I am so over people thinking we all have to look at things the same.
Celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, winter solstice, or whatever you choose the way you see fit.
Do not feel you have to spend money you don't have or need. Do not feel you have to attend all the parties and celebrations. Do not feel you have to decorate. You DO have control over YOU!
That is probably the most control you have in this life - YOU!
That is powerful when you realize it.
Find joy where you can.
Don't let others MAKE you feel bad for how you 'celebrate' or don't.
Know you are loved by others - people you may not have ever actually met.
I try to keep this as a safe place for people. We do not have to agree - that is OK. I try to avoid certain subjects that causes angst in people (it does me too!).
We share and care - and THAT is a huge part of what we need to celebrate. It is called LOVE!
May you find a spark of joy here!!!
Have a blessed day.
People who avoid what they don't agree with cause us all to lose a little bit. Not talking about you.
ReplyDeleteWell, I will choose that over causing strife all the time. Just me!
DeleteOverwhelmed...you hit the nail on the head! I have to talk to myself all season to avoid this yearly. Each year I do a little better with it. I just keep reminding myself that Jesus is the reason for the season. Everything else is something we choose or don't choose to do. Thanks, Cheryl...what an eloquent and peace giving reminder!
ReplyDeleteExactly, Linda. Wishing you peace in the days ahead. --Elise
DeleteLinda - just do what you feel comfortable with. Life is just to short to drive yourself crazy - when you should be enjoying instead. May your next few weeks be lovely.
DeleteI'm okay with people that don't agree with me. They're wrong, of course, but I'm okay with that! snort 😂😆😂😆
ReplyDeleteI've shared with y'all that my childhood Christmas memories are not good ones so I never get all hyped up. I'm happy to send out the gifts I send and call it done. I'm not even sending Christmas cards this year. I'm sending Valentine cards instead!! It won't surprise anyone and it'll help me use up a glut of pink paper I've mysteriously amassed. So it's tightwad, too!
Hubs loves it so I will decorate for him. But it's a quiet and simple December for us, as usual.
Quiet and simple sounds lovely. So do Valentine cards!
DeleteI do nothing just to please others (anymore). Life is short - just enjoy
Perfect time for this post, Cheryl. I was just thinking about this. I realized, at age 75, that I am always so glad when all holidays are over, including birthdays. I think we are so ingrained in expectations that we wonder if we are doing "enough." I don't remember much about childhood Christmases, which I find odd, except by pictures I have seen. I have always tried to make things special for my kids and grandkids...but always wonder if it "is enough". My grandparents booked cruises for the holiday, to avoid having to choose which of their 3 kids to visit. Only a few times do I remember them at our home when all 3 of their families would be in attendance. Imagine the work that was for my mother! She pulled it off somehow. I will be checking back to see the other comments...
ReplyDeleteYou know I remember Christmas's - but I do not remember the gifts much at all. I remember the meals, the family, the snow - all those things. Even the church pageants.
DeleteKids will remember you for your loving heart - not the stuff. I bet you do more than enough.
I've mentioned that my holiday memories are not good. All of the pictures have us kids crying or looking very somber and unhappy. Husband worked for the USPS for 26 years, and the holidays in the mail sorting division were a hellish nightmare for him. I am spiritual, but neither one of us are religious. So, needless to say, we don't observe Christmas any longer.
ReplyDeleteCheryl, I absolutely agree with you. Other people are free to have their own opinions (about anything, not just holidays), but they are not free to try to change me or shame me for MY opinions. While I welcome reasoned (as opposed to emotional) debate, this is NOT the forum for it.
Frances, I worked for USPS for 30 years. So, totally understand the feelings your husband had. You feel totally exhausted at Christmas.
DeleteFrances - I agree totally. I will never try to change someone's opinion or beliefs - they can hear mine - if they like them, fine - if not, fine. I agree. this is not a place for that. We are just a bunch of friends enjoying each other's company and having a chat.
DeleteI can understand why you feel like you do. Love that you do YOU!
Cheryl, I so agree with you about doing what works for you without apology, just like Willie Nelson! Obligations & expectations can be burdensome. As a youngster, the magic of Christmas couldn't come fast enough. As an adult responsible for creating the magic, Christmas would come too fast. I appreciate the distraction & anticipation of the holiday in the deep, dark winter.
ReplyDeleteOh I agree -as a child I couldn't wait. Now, it is like next years will be here in a flash!!!!! LOL
DeleteMagic can really be simple if we allow it. Kids just love the little things and that makes them happy. We try to make it big! That is what I believe. Enjoy the anticipation!
This was the verse in my devotional book yesterday: "Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom." (2 Cor. 3:17) That fits perfectly with your post today, Cheryl. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteNo two holiday seasons are the same, and none look like a Norman Rockwell painting, but it comes around every year. I've been thinking it's best to be mindful and grateful for all the simple comforts we have. If a holiday season is rough--for whatever reason--it's best to hope for brighter days ahead. And yes, there are people who love us whether or not we're aware of it. Fur babies, too. They give us unconditional love. We can try to give that to others ANY time of year. It's a choice. We're free to choose.
I've no idea what this Christmas will look like in my household. We've kept it low key since our sons reached adulthood. My sister spends 3 full days decorating her whole house. I don't. We may or may not put up a tree this year, depending on how it goes. There are some gifts to wrap. I'll send out cards since I bought those and a roll of stamps. One way or another it will be a GOOD Christmas... if we decide it will be. I don't worry about what others think. Especially not this year.
Praying for you, Cheryl, and everyone here. Every day. Thank you for your prayers for my MIL. The hospice nurses said it will now be a day, maybe two. Gratefully, they found a med combo to keep her comfortable. Soon, she'll be free. Free of pain. Free of this world.
Love to all. --Elise
Thank you, Elise, for praying for us all…I really appreciate it. I’m glad they found a med combo to help keep your MIL comfortable.
DeleteHappy Birthday, Jesus!
p.s. forgot to sign my name, Mary 🥰
DeleteThank you, Mary. That's my MIL's name, too. :-)
DeleteEveryone here feels like family and I mean that in a GOOD way. I'm just so grateful for Cheryl and all of you. Sounds corny, but it's true. 2022 has been a challenging year.
--Elise
I love the devotion Elise. Yes, we need to live each day the same - being kind and loving others. Not being nasty and picky to others. We need to try to be the best we can be 365.
DeleteYou are all extended family to me and I love that you are in my life. Not sure how I would have handled the last few years without you all.
Hope your MIL gets HOME soon! He awaits.
She passed away peacefully today. Thank you again for all your prayers. Cheryl, you're a bigger blessing to us all than you'll ever know. I'm very grateful for everyone here. --Elise
DeleteElise I will keep all the family in my prayers for peace and love. She is Home and with her Savior - praise the Lord.
DeleteI know it is hard to think about now - but spend this holiday season honoring her and all she brought into the world!
Sending lots of love and HUGS!
Sympathy on your loss, may you find comfort.
Delete"In Heaven now she waiting stands
To welcome us to that blessed land"
MaryB in NC
I'm so sorry for your loss Elise. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
DeleteThank you all. It's an odd mix of relief for her and sadness. I believe God sent Blue to us--in part--to help with the sadness.
Delete--Elise
I'm reading the comments here and enjoying and even relating to some of it. I get it. On decorating? I'm trying to do more like my mom did. She put up a nice tree in the living room and a nativity scene every year. She would put up gold tinsel artfully in a scroll shape on the coffee table and the short bookcase and that's a bout it and it was lovely. Back then Christmas trees in children's or adult's bedrooms was unheard of, people would have been shocked on that. I'm almost 62 and I love the little four foot trees now! : ) I have one in my living room on my childhood coffee table (the one my mom put the tinsel on) against the wayy with soft white lights and later I'll add my dollar tree pale pink bulbs with some doggy ornaments and 30s vintage cards tucked in with icicles I have another four foot little tree on my cedar chest in my breakfast area in eye shot of the other tree (open plan home) with soft lights and children's Christmas books underneath. I call it Mimi's coffee shop! (I paid ten dollars a piece on clearance at different times) I have my beautiful nativity from Hobby Lobby next to that on my little island with lights. If I stop now...It's enough. : ) I'll see what I get the druthers to do but I keep reminding myself that anything I put out I must put up too! lol I'm not exactly the "Hostess with the Mostest" hahaha but I do want to be the most loving Mimi always armed with sweet books and arts and crafts plus apples and cherub oranges ; ). For me? I'm enjoying listening to my Bing Crosby Christmas cd with those beautiful old, old songs and yesterday I had 'The Bells of St. Mary's' on in the background as I prepared supper...Now that is some good stuff. : )
ReplyDeleteI hear ya on what you're saying, I do speak my mind but if someone doesn't agree that's okay let's just all shut up and be quiet if we don't agree right? I've had a couple of 'embroilios' with persons who did not agree with my blog or even lately a comment on a youtube channel. It can be unnerving the way people go over boundaries. I've even had people track me down...Unnerving yes. (That is why I use George and Mary Bailey photo) That's pretty much us anyhow. Haha. Hubs has always worked straight commission in our real estate company and he's always helping people like George Bailey. (A good thing).
Merry Christmas season to you Cheryl, I so understand what you are saying. We all need to have freedom to share our hearts and also have consideration in replying or commenting. It's nice to be nice. : ) Yes indeedie.
Your trees and decorations sound just lovely. When I put up a tree it is a small one on the library table that came from my grandparents' home. That is the table Santa always set up the tree on for my mom and her siblings. Yes, Santa brought the tree. I just keep that going.
DeleteI love sitting in a dark room with the little tree lit with multi-colored lights and just being cozy and remembering past years.
Can't believe you have been stalked - crazy! I love getting cars and I have received a couple gifts - but no crazy stuff. YIKES
Yes, I like we can share our hearts and we all understand. It IS nice to be nice!
Oh how nice Cheryl, I just love that! : ) I used to use the colored lights mixed with white ones...When I had the bigger tree. I love the colored lights too, especially the little pink ones!
DeleteChristmas lights are just magical. There is something about them that just takes us back to another time. I love that.
DeleteThank you for you always wise and upbeat writing. I agree with you wholeheartedly. We can respect, love and appreciate each other even, or especially in our differences. Blessings of the season to you and yours. Lynn Ewing
ReplyDeleteLynn you are so right. I like that - "especially in our differences". That is pretty profound. Enjoy your season as well.
DeleteYou're absolutely right Cheryl. For my family, Christmas comes with a hint of sorrow as it was my mother's birthday. She passed away, far too young at 74, almost 20 years ago. My children and I usually talk about our happy memories of mom/grandma after our meal.
ReplyDeleteTalking about those happy memories and sharing stories, makes her part of the day. We did that Thanksgiving - talked about Glen - he was there in my heart!
DeleteI am sorry that you have that pain - but I bet you all honor her memory wonderfully!
This is so true. The holidays can be a real trial for some. I know I had a few blue days before Thanksgiving reliving the babies' deaths. Also, people are alone and that bothers me. I am not alone and that bothers me...:)
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely. I live alone - but I do have family and friends to share things with - so I am both lucky and grateful.
DeleteI thought so much about your family around Thanksgiving - so hard that had to be. I prayed for their daddy and the rest of the family. We all face out battles and our wins.
You have given us a very nice message for this holiday season, Cheryl. To be joyful for whatever reason; to put a little sparkle on the dark days of the year if you want to; to receive and give messages of love and hope. It connects us as humans.
ReplyDeleteTasha Tudor was a woman who lived as she chose to; simply and yet keeping old fashioned traditions. Her motto was 'Take joy' and it is so simple really, to just take joy wherever it may be found.
Love that quote. Yes take whatever is given and sprinkle that stuff around like sugar!!!!!!! Life is really what we make it - good or bad. We have to decide what our REACTIONS will be - that decides our day! Thanks.
DeleteThis year I am feeling a bit overwhelmed. More my fault than anything else. I just started preparing too late. I make most of my gifts and I just waited a couple of months too long to start. I will do what I can (must finish the gifts though) and if things aren't done, well there is always next year.
ReplyDeleteGod bless.
I hear that! I am making what I can at this point, then well - may have to buy some things. Not going to beat myself up. Don't you either!!!
DeleteThis can be an overwhelming time of year. It's okay to back away from some of the traditions and busyness.
ReplyDeleteI agree wholeheartedly! So much pressure is put upon everyone from every direction. Yep, it is OK to step back.
Delete.
I have found many sparks of joy on your blog, and you are the best spark ! Thanks for making us all feel special. Cindy/WV
ReplyDeleteAaahhh thank you so much. I get my joy from all my friends here. You guys keep me going!
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