I know we are never ready to lose anyone - but I sure wasn't ready for my sweet Glen to move on so soon. This is just awful.
I am trying to make heads or tails of things. I have to wait on several things until I get the actual death certificates in my hands. I understand that, they have to have proof.
Luckily I can survive until that is all taken care of.
I sat down yesterday and went through bills - trying to figure what had been paid and what needed to be. I paid our property taxes. I think I have figured it all out. I will be doing things 'the old fashioned way' - writing checks! No online stuff for me.
Oh my word, Glen was sure a packrat when it came to paper work. Why oh why, were there folders of things that weren't important at all from 5-6 years ago?
I have started to just go through things slowly. I did go to the bank and transfer some money to take care of things for the next couple months - at least until everything is settled.
Lists and more lists are being made. So many things to think about and do. I have always been a list person - but now especially.
I had this saying put on his memorial card. I love it and thought it may resonate with others as well.
THANK YOU to each and every person who has sent love and prayers and virtual hugs. I am so overwhelmed by the love from every corner of the globe. My cup is full of love!
Thank you for the words of advice.
I will not be making any big decisions for ages. I am now just moving forward one day at a time. That is the most I can do at this time. This is just so difficult and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
Starting next week, until I get my head back on straight, I will be posting little informative memes just to help folks out. I will get myself together soon.
Again, THANK YOU for all the love. Family, friends, and faith has held me up. God is my comforter.
God bless you all.
Thank you Cheryl for sharing as you learn a new path. Prayers for you and positive thoughts and love.
ReplyDeleteHugs.
Joy
Thank you
DeleteCheryl, you are an amazing strong person. I know you can do this. I wish with all of my heart you didn't have to but I know you can. I am so happy that Glen made sure you would be OK financially. There are so many people out there that do not have their finances in order and have to go through what you are with that burden also. Hugs and prayers, Marybeth
ReplyDeleteThank you so much. Yes, we planned for the worst, never wanting it to happen. One day at a time.
DeleteRecovering from grief takes a long, long time. I cannot even imagine how hard it is when it is your husband you've lost. As you know, we lost my mother in law last June and trying to help my father in law though the grief was heartbreaking. We bought a mini van so he would have an easier time getting into and out of a vehicle as he was 95. I took him on long drives often to get him out and focused on other things. When he died in November that mini van was a daily reminder of the loss of those two dear parents. I literally cried when I got into the van each day and thought of how he loved to ride. Last month, we finally decided the mini van had to go. It brought no joy to us. We traded it in (even though it was only 9 months old) and bought an SUV. It was like a weight was lifted off my shoulders! I know the advice is don't make big decisions until a year has passed, but sometimes when something just reminds you of a painful memory it's good to just let it go.
ReplyDeleteYes some things are more reminders than others. It is so hard. I will find joy again, I know. He would EXPECT me too.
DeleteThank you
Oh Cheryl, I thought of you so often this last week. I have cried many times while doing small tasks as I thought of you and your grief. I just wish I could do something for you and I feel so helpless. I just pray that you can get through this, my dear friend. Give yourself time.
ReplyDeleteYour prayers and thoughts are doing a lot for me. No one how much those things really do help.
DeleteEach day is a new beginning on a loooooong journey.
Thank you.
(((((HUGS))))) my sweet friend. I love the poem you picked out in remembrance of Glen, it is perfect. As I watched my hubby do the bills yesterday I thought of you once more and how that is all on your shoulders now and how overwhelming that might be. My continued love, prayers and support are with you as you embark on this path.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I guess God has a different path for us than what we think we will have. He has control.
DeleteThank you for your thoughts and prayers.
Oh Cheryl, I am so sorry.
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine what you are going through. Losing parents and other relatives is nothing like losing your soul mate. Take it one day at a time. My best friend lost her husband suddenly a few years ago, and I know there were times she was angry at him for leaving her. But the pain lessens eventually.
Prayers for comfort.
Tremendous sadness, but yes anger too! One day at a time is all I can accomplish for now.
DeleteThanks you.
Cheryl, God bless you too. The poem you had put on Glen's memorial card was lovely and I'm sure a comfort to others.
ReplyDeleteI thought it was so pretty.
DeleteGod bless
Cheryl, you picked a beautiful sentiment to honor the many years of sharing with Glen. Continuing to hold you in my thoughts and prayers, and wishing God's peace for you in this new chapter.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much. I need those prayers for sure.
DeleteCheryl, I know it will be hard but you will get it. I pay the bills with a check...easier to me and it comes out of your account when your ready. I've been thinking and praying for you since I read about Glen.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I am glad others are still a bit old fashioned as well!
DeleteDear Cheryl,
ReplyDeleteYou picked a lovely poem for your Glen.
I have thought of you every day since reading your sad news and like many people I am keeping you in my prayers.
Debra
Thank you so much - much appreciated.
DeleteCheryl, I think you are doing an admirable job of just "being". You are keeping busy and working towards goals using your lists. I think that is probably the best thing you can do. That is what I do in times of stress and trouble, too.
ReplyDeleteKeeping you in my prayers. You can do this! xo Diana
Thank you Diana. Busy helps a bunch!
DeleteThat is a beautiful poem you chose. I think about you and pray for you often. I wish there was more that I could do. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much. Prayers is what I need.
DeleteTake your time, Cheryl. My mom died in 13 - she lived with us- her knitting basket is exactly the same as it was when she went into the hospital. I still can't do anything with it. Her winter hat is still on a peg in her room. I guess I'm still working through it! I don't think there's any absolute for losing someone.
ReplyDeleteHugs to you.
Everything will come in time. I know that. It is so tough.
DeleteThank you for your kind thoughts and words.
I thought about you all day on Tuesday, whispering a prayer several times throughout the day. I'm glad to see your post this morning.
ReplyDeleteI have surely felt the love and prayers. They have helped me immensely. Thank you so much.
DeleteYes Cheryl it is ok to say "THIS SUCKS SO BAD!" It's ok to scream, cry and yell and get mad and bawl and fall apart. Remember you are not alone when doing this, ok. Those that don't understand need to leave now. Surround yourself with loved ones and no drama ones.
ReplyDeleteDon't move one day at a time. Just move one hour at a time. One day will come but not now. If it's overwhelming break it down in small steps even if it is only one step.
Know that we are all here for you. That some of us have been through this and we want to be your strength right now. Don't be afraid to ask us. I am here any time you need a friend. You have been on my mind all week. I have been worried about you. Thank you for checking in. I know it was hard.
I have thrown things and cried a lot. I get angry and sad and lonely.
DeleteI am having to distance from some people that normally drain me if I am around them, and I sure can't handle that now. I have to concentrate on me.
Thank you for your kind words. I feel so much love here.
I mentioned yesterday that it is amazing how much love I feel from people I have never personally met, yet I get nothing from some family that should be reaching out.
It says so much about people.
Blessings.
I've been away and away from reading blogs. I am so, so sorry Cheryl. I know this is just so, so bad. So very bad. No words right? My stepdad who I loved dearly passed away from a heart attack. It was the worst day of my life. My mom was sent home in a taxi with his clothes over her arm. My little girls lost their best friend.
ReplyDeleteMy prayers are with you, and I so get the "Ascension" that will be in the programs. I lost my real dad almost two years ago as well. That reading is spot on.
May God be with you in huge and special ways. Oh, the shock of it all. It is so very painful. Just. So. Painful.
My sincere prayers and care will be with you Cheryl. Love, Amelia a blogging friend.
Thank you so much and I am sorry for your loss as well. We are never ready - but knowing we will see each other again one day is wonderful.
DeleteGod bless
Please give yourself time to grieve, especially after such a sudden death.
ReplyDeleteThank you - I will take all the time I need for me.
DeleteLovely lady my heart is going out to you. Sending you hugs from across the planet.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much. God bless you
Delete